“Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.” — I Peter 3:1-2
In this verse, the Apostle Peter is speaking specifically to married women, not to unmarried women. The word “submissive” comes from the Greek word hypotassō, which means to place under, to subject oneself, to obey, or to submit to another’s authority. The context of this submission is within marriage This instruction is directed toward wives in relation to their own husbands, not to men in general. The Bible does not call women to be subject to all men, but only to their husbands, the one they are united with in covenant before God.
To grasp this word more deeply, we can look at how it’s used elsewhere in the Bible.
When Jesus was a child, He was subject to His earthly parents, Mary and Joseph (Luke 2:51). Even though He was the Son of God, He chose to obey them not because they were greater, but to fulfill righteousness and demonstrate perfect obedience. Likewise, children are called to honor and obey their parents because parents carry wisdom and experience that guide their children in the right path. This obedience is for protection and growth. Yet, Scripture also commands parents not to provoke their children to anger (Ephesians 6:4). God gives authority not for abuse, but for loving guidance and care.
Peter uses hypotassō again when instructing believers to submit to governing authorities (1 Peter 2:13–14). Why? Because government, though imperfect, is established by God to maintain order on earth (Romans 13:1–2). Even when Christians faced persecution and injustice, Peter still encouraged submission not as blind obedience, but as a testimony of faith and trust in God’s sovereignty. To resist lawful authority brings consequences, but to submit with a right heart brings peace and honor to God.
Peter also uses the word submission when addressing servants toward their masters (1 Peter 2:18). This is one of the most sensitive passages in Scripture, but Peter was not endorsing slavery. Instead, he was teaching believers how to live righteously in a fallen system without losing faith or dignity. We see an example in Hagar, when she fled from Sarah’s harsh treatment, the angel of the Lord told her to return and submit (Genesis 16:9). God did not ignore her suffering; He promised to bless her and her descendants. This shows that submission never goes unnoticed. God sees, judges, and vindicates in His perfect time. Likewise, the Bible commands masters to treat their servants justly, knowing that they too are subject to the Lord Jesus (Ephesians 6:9).
Now we begin to understand why subjection is so important, not only because God commands wives to be in subjection to their own husbands, but because it is a principle for everyone. As 1 Corinthians 14:33 reminds us, “God is not the author of confusion but of peace.” Wherever there is divine order, there is harmony, righteousness, and peace.
Wives are not commanded to submit to their husbands because they are less, inferior, or weak. Women are created in the image and likeness of God (Genesis 1:27). There is no inferiority in God’s creation, after God created woman, He said that everything was very good. Yet after the fall (Genesis 3:16), the relationship between man and woman became strained. What was once harmony became a battle for control. That is why God said to Eve, “Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” This was not a command for domination, but an instruction for order within marriage, so that husband and wife could live together in harmony under God’s design.
The New Testament reveals this truth even more clearly, showing us that marriage is a reflection of Christ and His Bride, the Church. Just as the Church submits to Christ, so wives are called to submit to their husbands. And just as Christ loved the Church and gave His life for her, so husbands are called to love their wives with the same sacrificial and unconditional love. Remember, God said that man was given authority to have dominion over the earth and subdue it (Genesis 1:28). God’s intention for marriage was never for Adam or any man to dominate his wife, but to lead her, love her and protect her, just as Christ loves and protects His Church. When a wife submits to her husband, she is not merely yielding to a man, but honoring God’s design.
Remember, when Eve stepped outside of that order and acted independently of her husband, the result was the destruction of God’s perfect design. Through her disobedience, sin entered the world. Later, Sarah’s lack of submission to God’s timing led her to give Hagar to Abraham, producing Ishmael and even today, the descendants of Ishmael and Isaac live in conflict. Rebecca took matters into her own hands by deceiving Isaac and teaching Jacob to deceive his own father create division and strife between the brothers.
These stories in Scripture remind us of a simple but serious truth: whenever we step outside of God’s order, chaos always follows. The command to live in submission wasn’t only given to believing husbands and wives. It applies even to those living among unbelievers. Apostle Peter continues in saying, “Even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.”
In Peter’s time, many women had come to faith before their husbands. His instruction was meant to guide them on how to live righteously, even in a home where their spouse did not yet believe. Their godly character not their disputes was meant to draw their husbands toward believing to the LORD Jesus Christ.
Many of us are not in submission to God anymore. We no longer prioritize reading His Word or spending time in prayer with Him. Because of our lack of knowledge of God’s Word, we end up being destroyed. How can we expect to make the right decisions in life without the guidance of God’s Word? The same applies to marriage. We are clearly instructed, “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers” (2 Corinthians 6:14). The moment we turn away from God’s Word, we open the door to disobedience and where there is disobedience, there will always be chaos, confusion, and destruction.
Wives are commanded to be subject to their own husbands. But how can we claim that Christ has saved us if there is no transformation in our lives? You cannot win your husband to the Lord through constant conflict, disrespect, or disobedience. Those attitudes do not reflect the character of Jesus Christ. Instead, Peter teaches that a wife can win her husband “without a word” through her conduct by living with gentleness, purity, and a quiet spirit that honors God. And this kind of character isn’t just for wives, it’s for everyone who follows Christ. We are not called to be rude, wrathful, or impure, but to walk in humility, patience, and love.
Paul echoes this same truth in 1 Corinthians 7:16, asking, “How do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband?” Yet he also makes it clear that if an unbelieving spouse chooses to leave, the believer is “not under bondage in such cases, for God has called us to peace.” And let’s be clear, submission does not mean enduring abuse or harm. God never calls anyone to stay in a place of physical or sexual abuse. That’s not peace! God is not the author of confusion. Jesus is the Prince of Peace. Peace cannot coexist where sin and abuse are present. God’s commandments were given so that we could live in harmonious relationships where peace, love, and joy reign among one another. These commands were never meant to be twisted or used against their true purpose, but to protect us and to keep our relationships in His divine order. Above all, true submission begins with submission to God. When we surrender our hearts to His Word and walk daily in His Spirit, He fills us with wisdom and discernment to know what is right, what is safe, and what is pleasing to Him.
Submission to our husbands is submission to God and His order.
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